Tag Archives: self aware

This song hit a cord

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Tiffany Eckhardt, certified life coach. Helping women believe their best years are ahead.
You can buy yourself flowers.

You can’t scroll through Instagram without hearing Miley Cyrus’s new song Flowers in all the latest REELS. This song has hit a cord for me, not in an angry man-hating way, but in an empowered healthy way.  

It definitely runs on repeat in my head. I’m singing it in the shower, while I’m doing dishes and humming it at random times.

I don’t want Jeff to get the wrong idea, but I love singing it.

I went down a rabbit hole reading tabloid articles about why Miley wrote the song.  Many say it was in response to her failed marriage or a comeback to Bruno Mar’s song When I Was Your Man.  

Either way, it doesn’t explain why it hit a cord with me.  

What’s wrong with me?

I hate to admit this, but I used to make Jeff responsible for my emotions.  I constantly needed to feel connected, to be entertained and affirmed.  At the root, I had a gut feeling that I was not lovable.  Wow!  That’s a heavy load for Jeff to carry.  

Yeah, I love it when sweet Jeff brings me flowers.  But if he doesn’t show up with the flowers, I don’t make it mean that there is something wrong with me.  

Of course we need relationships

Love and connection are two of the six basic human needs.  

However, you may feel miserable if you’re thinking…

If only my husband would (fill in the blank)

My children don’t (fill in the blank)

No one sees what I do for them.

You might not want to hear this, but we never really show up in ways that are easy to be around when we have thoughts that make us feel sad, lonely or miserable,

Maybe you just want a hug, but it’s hard to hug a prickly cactus.  

The relationship that changed

Miley’s song is a celebration for me.  

My relationship with myself changed, and has made my relationship with Jeff incredible.  

For the first time in my life I am comfortable in my own skin, know at a deep level that my life has meaning and understand what’s going on internally when I’m upset. 

Jeff’s no longer responsible for that heavy load.  

Now, I can buy myself flowers just because it makes me smile.  I have dance parties in my kitchen when no ones looking and spend hours journaling in an attempt to understand myself.  I actually love my own company now.  

That shift is SO empowering!  

Buy yourself flowers

So, how do you shift?

I work with clients all the time who are not even aware of the beliefs that are dictating how they show up in relationships.  

If you are tired of feeling lonely, unappreciated, unlovable (or any combination of emotions), I would love to help you.  

Once you shift from feeling like a victim to becoming empowered, Miley’s song will hit a new cord for you too.  

You will want to buy yourself flowers!  Write your name in the sand…talk to yourself for hours… 

You will take yourself dancing because YOU can love YOU better…. And you should.

Here’s to celebrating YOU!

~Tiffany

And the birds fluttered around her writing “YES” in the sky

Spread your wings and soar

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Tiffany Eckhardt, certified life coach helps women believe their best years are ahead.

Far too many people sit on the sidelines of life.  Given the chance to spread your wings and soar, would you choose the safety of what you know instead, even when it’s uncomfortable?

Midlife is the chance to create magic for yourself, to even go a completely different direction in the second half of life.  

Why on earth would you not seize this season, an opportunity to create the life you’ve always wanted? 

What is clipping your wings?

The biggest reason you don’t take flight is a resistance to change.  It’s scary.  

Almost everyone I’ve worked with has felt as if they were at a crossroads, but are stuck thinking the following…  

What will their family and friends say?

They’re thinking, “now what” because they’re not sure of what they want or who they want to be.  

The fear of failure keeps them from moving forward with any ideas. To make it worse, some even think they’re too old to try something new.

Many feel lonely and unsupported, while other people seem to have it all together on social media.  

Some feel hopeless and depressed as if they can’t see past the hand they’ve been dealt.  

What do you have to believe to spread your wings and soar?

You have to believe that your best years are ahead.  

Suffering is optional. As a life coach, I help women identify their resistance and think differently about their future.  

I’d love to help you stop waisting precious time on the sidelines.  You still have a lifetime to create, dreams to discover, hobbies to explore and personal goals to realize.  It’s not time to rest in a rocker on the front porch of life.  If you rest, you rust.  

There is purpose and meaning in this season.  I believe YOUR best years are ahead!  

If you are ready to spread your wings, schedule a FREE chat with me today by visiting my calendar link.  OR if you are local, let’s meet for coffee. Message me if that sounds good!

Here’s to flying free and soaring into the future!

~Tiffany

And the birds fluttered around her writing “YES” in the sky. 

Hiding in plain sight

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Are you hiding your gifts in plain sight? Tiffany Eckhardt, certified life coach helps women find the reasons they are hiding and inspires them to explore what makes them feel alive.

Scrolling through Facebook the other day, I was drawn to a story of a violinist playing in the New York subway.  Turns out he was the famous Joshua Belle.  No one who passed him by knew or appreciated his gift of music.  Although he played at a sold out theater in Boston two days before, this performance only earned him $30 in the subway.  The violinist was hiding in plain sight.  

I had a client this week tell me she had been hiding in plain sight.  She struggled with spelling as a child.  Instead of getting help, she found ways to accommodate and hide it.  She has a brilliant mind, but allowed this one area to hold her back.  

She was not the only one to make that statement.  My business coach pointed out to me that I had been hiding in plain sight.  I do the things that I’m good at, but not the things that actually move the needle in my coaching business.  OUCH!  I thoroughly enjoy writing and sharing my life on social media… but God forbid if I actually talk to women about midlife.  

Talking to Jeff about this idea of hiding in plain sight, he reminded me of his desire to play the cello.  There is a physical therapist at his hospital who also teaches Cello lessons.  He has never met her, just knows about her.  This mystery woman makes him wonder what gifts his coworkers have that he’d never know about.

Well, what does hiding in plain sight really mean?  

Maybe you just feel that your gifts are not appreciated, so you’d rather not share them.

Do you have beliefs about your abilities that prevent you from stepping into things you’ve always wanted to do?

Are you only doing what comes easy and avoiding what is challenging?

Do your coworkers or friends know that you play the cello or create works of art in your spare time?

The good news

Midlife is the perfect time to share your gifts with a world that desperately needs people who choose vitality.  

The gift of midlife is having time to roam, and to be surprised to learn something new about yourself in the process.  

What could you get lost for hours doing? 

Are you hiding in plain sight?

I’m not just hiding behind my writing.  I’d actually love to chat with you about the areas of your life that you’re hiding in plain sight.  

I’d love to help you first find the reasons you’re hiding, and then inspire you to explore what makes you feel alive.  

If this is you, I have made it easy!  Either reach out to me on any of my social media platforms or use my calendar link to schedule a time that works for you.  

Here’s to the gift of midlife and allowing our gifts to shine!

~Tiffany

And the birds fluttered around her writing “YES” in the sky!

Dancing with your dreams

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Tiffany Eckhardt, helping women make it through midlife without a crisis.
Revival Mercantile, Brenham, Texas

After closing my store four years ago, I never thought I’d get back on the dance floor with my antique dream.  Yet, here I am dancing with my dreams.  

Coaching women who are struggling to see their next step has taught me the importance of following your bliss.  It is not a cliché, clients really do come alive when they discover who they are and what makes them feel alive.  

My bliss is found in creating spaces, offering hospitality and inspiring others.  I especially feel alive when I am hunting for unique pieces, and then working them into a beautiful space for others to enjoy.  

Revival Mercantile 

My unique finds have found a home at Revival Mercantile in Brenham, Texas.  Stacy, the store owner, hosts a community of creators on the second floor of her historic building that once bottled soda.  The brick walls and hardwood floors are the perfect backdrop.  

I love Revival’s mission statement… Our carefully curated collections tell your story and honor your journey. 

“It’s not what I do, it’s who I am.” Maverick

Creating spaces isn’t what I do, it’s who I am.  It’s more than a soul sucking job, but a chance to offer my spark of creativity.  

There is a danger in confusing what you do with your identity.  I follow retirement groups that regularly discuss the fear of retiring and loosing the identity they’ve held for decades.  That fear sadly implies that retirement is a dead end and not an opportunity to dance with dormant dreams.

I believe it’s important to get to know yourself, to follow your bliss until you land in a beautiful spot that sets your soul on fire!  It’s really about offering the world what only you can offer.  

Can you feel the difference?  

It’s your chance to dance

I invite you to join me on the dance floor of life.  You are not a wallflower.  

This is your season to follow your bliss, to discover who you are when you are dancing with your dreams.  

What are the things you’ve put off trying?  If making money was not the priority, what would you pursue?  

It is not the season to live vicariously through others.  If you need a little nudge out on the dance floor, I can help.  

I invite you to schedule a consultation… a chat to see if working with me is a good fit for your journey.  Simply reach out to me or use my calendar link to pick a time/date that works for you. 

Here’s to following your bliss on the dance floor! It’s a revival! 🙂

~Tiffany

And the birds fluttered around her writing “YES” in the sky! 

What is keeping you stuck

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Tiffany Eckhardt, certified life coach, helping women make it through midlife without a crisis. In this blog, she talks about not being a pansy, but a dandelion.

I’ve been journaling about my inability to get in shape.  Well, you can’t actually get in shape if you are avoiding exercise and having too many cocktails.  What is keeping me stuck?

I vacillate between dreading the workouts and loathing myself for not doing the workouts, two sides of the same coin… shame.  

Thoughts are self-fulling prophesies.  Somewhere along the way I had a thought that this should be easy.  

When it is not easy, it becomes easier to to avoid, to retreat from my goals and to give up.

I’m not a pansy.  I’m a dandelion.

The thought that I am not a pansy… I am a dandelion will kick my butt back in shape.  

Feel free to use the thought too, especially if you feel stuck.  

You have done hard things, so have I.  

Pansies represent loving feelings, but as a delicate flower has a reputation for weakness.  

Dandelions are determined and can grow anywhere in any condition.  Although this flower is considered a weed, it has been used to symbolize light, hope, and healing for centuries. Blowing on dandelion puffs feels playful, offering a hint of longevity as the seeds of hope are spread on the wind.

Can you see yourself as a dandelion?

Do you feel determined to become the woman you can admire, or are you avoiding the desires of your heart because you think it should be easier?  

I am going on record.  I’m officially ditching the narrative that it should be easier and embracing the discomfort of getting back in shape.  I value longevity and wellness, standing strong and being proud of how I show up for life.  I am worth the effort… and so are you!

Let’s cheer each other on!

You are not a delicate flower and can do hard things too! 

You’re a dandelion, the underdog of humble strength that offers abundant hope.  

If this resonates with you, let’s cheer each other on.  I’d love to hear about your journey.  

However, if you are vacillating between dread and loathing yourself, I can help you!  My clients are experiencing success in becoming the hero of their own story.  It helps to have someone listen to your story and help you see where you are stuck, and then get you on the road to creating the life YOU really want.  

I invite you to schedule a consultation… a chat to see if working with me is a good fit for your journey.  Simply reach out to me or use my calendar link to pick a time/date that works for you.  

Here’s to becoming a strong, determined dandelion.  

~Tiffany

And the birds fluttered around her writing “YES” in the sky

The art of living intentionally

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Tiffany Eckhardt helps women make it through midlife without a crisis. She believes in the are of living intentionally. She can help you too!

Whoo hoo, you made it to midlife!  No doubt that you’ve done hard things along the way, but the journey doesn’t end when you send your adult children off into the world or the day after your retirement party.  In fact, it is time to get serious about the art of living intentionally and create the life you always dreamed.  

So, what are you waiting for?  

Recently I signed up for an online DIY chair reupholster class.  I have a longstanding chair addiction and always wanted to learn how to reupholster.  I claimed that I didn’t have time to learn, but the idea of sucking at it held me back for years.  What the heck?  Now I have plenty of time to get past sucking at it.

Learning is loving yourself 

A love of learning keeps you young.  With each new challenge, you become a better version of yourself.  Each new goal forces you to learn new skills and step outside your comfort zone.  

What opportunities exist for you to challenge yourself, try something that you’ve always wanted to?  

Midlife is your gift to explore all those interests you’ve thought about in the carpool line or sitting through an endless zoom call that could have been handled in an email.  What were your day dreams?  

Turn those daydreams into reality.

Dream like you did when you were five years, but imagine yourself living your dream five years in the future.

Here are a few journal prompts to spark your imagination.

Make a list of at least twenty five things you’ve always wanted to do.  

What skills will you need to learn?

What habits will help you achieve your dream?

Who do you need to connect with?

Cringe worthy

So, who cares if I suck at reupholstery?  I’ll share my journey even if it’s cringe worthy.  The truth is any skill can be learned.  In the process of sharing my journey, I hope to inspire you to step into a new challenge.    

If you are feeling hesitant, I’d love to help you with the art of living intentionally.  

I can help you identify the real reason you aren’t stepping into a fun future.  Once you remove all the excuses and fears, you’ll be free to create the life you always dreamed.  

What are you waiting for?   I invite you to schedule a chat with me… it gives you an idea of how coaching can help you to feel excited about midlife and get you moving past the emotions of starting something new.  

It is my intention that you believe your best years are ahead.  

Here’s to sucking at something new… only to discover new things about myself!

~Tiffany

And the birds fluttered around her writing “YES” in the sky!

Choose Yourself

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Tiffany Eckhardt, certified life coach and master of reinvention... want you to learn to choose you in midlife!

How often do you choose yourself? A common theme with the women I coach is learning to make yourself a priority in midlife. Some clients are learning to take back their time, while others are making this their time to shine.  

Choosing yourself is about finding significance in the opinion you hold of yourself.  ~Tiffany

Significance is not selfish, it’s one of the eight basic human needs.  I promise developing a healthy opinion does not make you a narcissist.

The real problem is people expect their needs to be met by others, wether the need is solving loneliness, feeling heard or finding purpose.  

So, it is not surprising when you find yourself disappointed with people or circumstances, especially when they are not meeting your needs.   

Choosing me is hard

I hate inconveniencing others and tend to project my feelings or expectations onto others.  

When I make decisions based on how it will affect the people around me, even when it is not in my best interest, I then tend to expect others to consider how their decisions will affect me.  

As I regularly preach, other people are not thinking of you.  They are busy meeting their own needs… a vicious cycle that is broken when you learn to meet your own needs, to choose yourself.  

A priority

After a recent fight with my husband, that revolved around making plans without discussing it first, this thought hit me like a ton of bricks.

How can I feel like a priority when the opinion I hold of myself is squat.

The fear of being unlovable or unworthy is very common, and not surprising that I caught myself in this pattern of belief.  I was making the plans my husband made mean I was not a priority, which was not what he meant at all.

Had I realized that I was triggered by the thought I was not a priority, I might have approached the topic completely different.  

Find freedom

It is my intention for you to believe that your best years are ahead and midlife is a precious gift, a time to find your significance in your own opinion.  

If you have a healthy self worth, good for you!  We need more people like you in the world.  By valuing yourself, you walk in freedom and no one has to live up to your expectations.

However, if you struggle with significance like I do, there is freedom for you too. 

Start acknowledging when you’re looking to outside influences to gain the value you seek.  

Learn to speak up for yourself.  

Believe your time is valuable.  

See your gifts are priceless.  

Start to choose yourself.  

I can help you traverse the web of thoughts ingrained in your opinion of yourself and create new ones that will empower you to move forward into an exciting, fun future.  

I invite you to schedule a free consultation.  Let’s chat about how working with me will help you create a healthy opinion of yourself.  I want to learn where you are at, and where you’d like to be in life.  

Here’s to finding significance in the opinion you hold of yourself!  And choosing to believe in your worth!

~Tiffany

And the birds fluttered around her writing “YES” in the sky!

Opportunities for resiliency

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Have you ever felt rode hard and put up wet?  That feeling is a clear sign that it is time to check-in, take stock and evaluate what you want to create for yourself and acknowledge the opportunity for resiliency.  

This morning I woke up with achey legs and feeling acidic.  My health and wellness is suffering from months under the pressure of planning a wedding, which by the way turned out perfect.  I skipped yoga and indulged in evening cocktails as I tried to turn off the constant to-do list in my head.

As I clean up the wedding whirlwind and a fun-filled week with my grandkids, thoughts of resiliency pop in my head.  

I feel exhausted, but it is time to focus on the life I want and who I want to be.  

Here are my random thoughts on resiliency.  

Messes clean up.

Weight gained can be lost.  

Hearts mend.  

The human body bounces back to wellness if taken care of.  

Kids will grow up, get married and have kiddos… and I continue to thrive (when I choose to).

Opportunities for resilience

Being aware of your resiliency is empowering.  

I am run down, out of shape and gained belly fat in the process, but I will not to hang out in self deprivation.  

This is just another opportunity to prove that I am resilient and can become a better version of me in the process.  

Opportunities for you to prove your resiliency exist too.  

Focus on the future

A journey of a thousand miles starts with one step, or in this case a thought.  

Start developing a dream of what you want for your life and how you want to show up.  

Start dreaming with the innocence of a five year old, but with the inner strength of the woman you will become five years in the future.  

Decide what you want to believe about yourself.  

Don’t be shy about asking for help!

It is my intention that you believe your best years are ahead.  I help women discover they are resilient and create the life they really want.  

I’d love to help you navigate your opportunities for resiliency.  

Reach out to me!  I offer a free consultation.  Simply click on my calendar link and choose a date and time that works for you.  

Don’t waste any more precious time stuck!  You are more resilient that you realize.  

And you don’t have to feel alone. It always helps to talk through your opportunity for resiliency with someone who is great at listening and can ask the right questions. 

Here’s to being resilient and thriving!

~Tiffany

And the birds fluttered around her writing “YES” in the sky.  

Seeds of potential

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What are your seeds of potential? Tiffany Eckhardt can help you identify your wheelhouse of gifts/talents and help you nurture your seeds of potential.

Yes, I am still obsessed with spring and gardening.  I can’t help it.  Lately, I’ve been focusing on my wheel house, where my seeds of potential lie in my natural gifts and talents.  I want you to discover your seeds of potential!

If you have followed me for any length of time, you will know I am a huge proponent of journaling.  Through journaling I discovered that I feel alive and find purpose in creating spaces, offering hospitality and inspiring others to live BIG lives.

Making decisions about how I invest my time is so easy now, as long as it falls into one of the three areas of my wheel house.  And to be clear, my wheel house looks more like a green house than a boat.  In this space I can nurture so many seeds of potential.  

Calibrate to your seeds

I recently listened to Ester Hicks describe calibration and it blew me away.  What you focus on is your point of attraction for your life.  

Let that sink in.

I want YOU to calibrate to your seeds of potential.  Start by honestly and with curiosity, journaling questions posed by Ester Hicks.   

Am I focused or confused?

Do I feel rooted in a broader understanding or flailing around in the unknown?

What are my strong desires and do I support these desires?

Do I believe I inherently know where the solutions are to my desires?

However you answer the above questions is your point of attraction, and what will likely sprout in the garden of your life.  

Offering grace

If your honest answers revealed that you are flailing around in confusion and neglecting your desires, let me offer you grace in that now you can understand what you don’t want and focus on what you want.  

“Remember, having faith means recognizing the value of what you are here to contribute to the world and allowing your actions to be grounded in that truth.”  ~Marie Forleo

You have special gifts that only you can contribute to the world.  Within your wheel house lies seeds of potential that will grace your life with so much purpose. 

If you find yourself unable to recognize your uniques gifts or worry your potential has gone fallow, I can help you find clarity to move towards your FUN future.  

I invite you to schedule a chat with me to explore your seeds of potential.  Simply click on my calendar link and pick a date/time that works for you.  

Here’s to flourishing in your own unique wheel house, nurturing your seeds of potential!

~Tiffany

And the birds fluttered around her writing “YES” in the sky!

Suffering is optional

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Tiffany Eckhardt, turning 52 could cause a crisis, but believes that suffering is optional... age is just a number.
So what I can’t tolerate dairy anymore! My hubby found a vegan red velvet cupcake!

This week I turned 52, the expected time frame for a midlife crisis. However, I believe that suffering is optional because age is just a number.  

You have the power to cultivate any outlook on life you want.  I love birthdays!

I was born in 1970 and am consider Gen X, the lost generation.  Who decides these things?  I don’t feel lost.  Do you? 

Funny thing is I can never remember how old I am, which is ridiculous given the easy math, but I also can never remember what day it is either.  

Jeff thinks it’s intentional.  Maybe it is.  LOL! 

How do you view birthdays?

Do you love birthdays?  If you don’t, what about a birthday makes you cringe?  

Does aging mean you loose purpose, as if the older you get the less meaning you have to others?  

Are you worried about being alone?  Loneliness is a real challenge for empty nesters.

Is your health the issue that has you loosing sleep at night?  

Your best years are ahead

While I recognize the down side of aging, I truly believe that there is way more to celebrate with each new year.  

The truth is you have the power to create wellness and take control of your health.  I am living proof of this!  No dairy? Jeff found vegan red velvet cupcakes for me… there’s always a solution.

You can learn to love your own company, another thing I have cultivated in my own life.  

Learning and investing in your growth never stops at a certain age.  Each new year is another opportunity to discover new things about yourself.  

The secret sauce is to discover your purpose and find meaning in this season.  You will then begin to loose track of time and love birthdays, as you truly believe your best days are ahead.  

Suffering is optional?

You seriously don’t have to indulge in suffering about your age or any other limiting belief.  If you are feeling sad or lonely I get it!  I still get lonely at times, and am sad that my house isn’t full of irreverent teenagers.  But…

“If you could only sense how important you are in the lives of those you meet; how important you can be to the people you may never even dream of.  There is something of yourself that you leave at every meeting with another person.”  Fred Rogers

I can help you walk through the real emotions that downsizing, or an empty nest can generate.  I understand the stages of change that you are dancing through, but I also know how to get you from resistance to resilience.  

Don’t waste any more time yearning for purpose or meaning in this season!  

You might be thinking that I don’t understand your situation. Try me!

I invite you to schedule a chat with me… it is so easy!  Simply follow my calendar link and pick a date/time that works for you.  I’d love to learn about your journey, where you are and where you’d like to be.  

Your best years are ahead and suffering is optional.

~Tiffany

And the birds fluttered around her writing “YES” in the sky.