Final 2019 message on failure

This is my final message on failure, for 2019. I’ve talked a lot about the fine art of failing. 

Failure is not taught in school.  Yet, all the successful people I’ve studied this year have harnessed the power of failing forward.  

Recognize YOUR script on failure.

  1. Can YOU agree?  
  • Life is 50/50 good & bad.  
  • Nothing worth having in life is handed to you.  
  • There is a lot you can learn from failure if you are curious.  
  • Failure can be good or bad.  You decide.

2. What is failure?

Failure is simply YOUR unmet expectations.  No one can define failure for you.   

2. How do you view failure?

  • Do you view it as something that happens to you from outside sources?
  • Do you view yourself as the failure, somehow broken and not capable?

Either approach to failure will not serve you!  YOUR approach to failure becomes a familiar story in your mind that will block any attempt to pursue greatness.  You are the captain of your own destiny.

For my recent Fail Friday Facebook Live, I shared Pema Chödrön’s book Fail. Fail Again. Fail Better.  Her wisdom can help flip the script on the olé familiar story.

  • View failures as portals of discovery, a chance to get creative and to learn something new.  
  • Be willing to feel a wide range of feelings when things don’t go the way you want them to.  {Rage, upset, sadness, loneliness}.  
  • Notice what you do in this space. Do you blame others?  Do you call yourself a failure? 

Get curious about your failure thoughts

Don’t believe all the stories that play on repeat in your mind, simply get curious about them.  Take time to ask yourself questions.

What is your inner dialog saying?  

How does the story impact your feelings?  

What actions do you take when you feel that way?  

What results are you getting from that space?  How is that working for you?

OK… enough talk about failure. Let’s Kick 2020 into gear by celebrating the 2019 successes.  

Success is defined as something that works out the way you expected it to. Focus on your 2019 successes and toot your own horn! 

Your homework, take a hot second to think good thoughts about yourself. Trust me it is fun!  

1. Make a list of ten successes you are proud of from 2019.  

  • Did you loose weight?  
  • Did you read the books you wanted to read?  
  • Did you travel?  
  • Did you buy that thing you’ve always wanted?  
  • Did you learn a language?  
  • Did you repair a relationship?
  • Did you start a business?
  • Did you reach a financial goal?
  • Did you get that raise?
  • Did you learn a new craft?  

Only YOU can determine what can be on that list.  

I firmly believe in the power of creating the life you want.  

What ever is on your list add the sentence “I created this.”  Friend, I promise you did something out of the ordinary to achieve that result.  

  • I lost twenty pounds and can wear that dress.  I created this.” 

2. Now imagine what you want to report on December 31, 2020.  

Take time to imagine yourself on December 31,2020.  Can you imagine how you will feel when you make your list of 2020 accomplishments at the end of next year? On the last day of 2020 what do you feel most proud of? What actions did you take? What results are you celebrating?

From this space, make your future list NOW.  Blow YOUR own mind in 2020!  Become the person of your dreams!

I am a product of the product.  

I spent nearly 50 years believing I was a failure, like there was something fundamentally wrong with me. I finally took hold of my thought life and am curious about my beliefs. I am proud of the person I am becoming.

I did the homework, and was blown away by my list of accomplishments in 2019.  Yes, I had unmet expectations.  I am not a failure. Failure doesn’t happen to me. I decide what it means in my life. I am free to recognize my own script and flip it!

Creating my 2019 list inspired me to create a list for 2020.  I’m excited to create the 2020 Tiff!  This is going to be the best decade of my life!

Let me help you create the life you want in 2020!  I will help you identify exactly where you are, where you want to go and the obstacles that will be in the way.  We’ll make a plan to hurdle any failure and celebrate all successes!  

I am offering coaching packages for 2020. Purchase a three month package before January 1, 2020 to receive a free copy of Pema Chödrön’s book Fail. Fail Again. Fail Better.  

Happy New Year!

~Tiffany

And the birds fluttered around her writing YES in the sky!  

What do curios people know?

What do curious people know?

What if curious people hold the secret to a successful life?  

Just curious, do you believe it’s possible to create the life of your dreams?  Could curiosity be the secret?

Travel has taught me to be curious. I love to wander the streets of cities we visit. I always wonder what is around the corner. Could there be something amazing to discover the next street over? Jeff and I have been lost more than once. Curiosity led Michele, Jeff and I to Paolo Sandulli’s art castle in Praiano, Italy. I’d say that was a successful day!

Martha Stewart contributes her success to an avid curiosity.  

Jeff Bezos’ childhood was marked by curious chaos.  Bezos’ mother believed it was her responsibility to allow deep dives into what he enjoyed.  She may have not always liked his questions, but gave him space to explore with curiosity.   

“We keep moving forward, opening new doors, and doing new things, because we’re curious and curiosity keeps leading us down new paths.”  Walt Disney

Curious people are known to think outside the box, not afraid to fail, explore new ideas, and have an unquenchable willingness to grow.  

See why I am drawn to curious friends?  They are kindred spirits who create their lives.  

Questions are the answers

What if curious folks just learned to ask good questions?  What if questions are the answers? 

“Getting the right question is the key to getting the right answer,”  Jeff Bezos.

Curious people tend to be innovative, not content with the status quo.  They are willing to question how they show up in their valued relationships, how their thought life effects their emotional balance and how to contribute with influence and purpose.  

What if a zesty life is an endless journey of discovery?  

How curious are you about YOUR life?  

I’ve seen firsthand the benefits of questioning my thoughts.  The right questions exposed strategic and obstructive thoughts.  Every thought creates a feeling.  Feelings influence our behavior, which gives us our results.  

Questions led to discovering what I really want in every area of my life.  

Let’s get curious about the thoughts that are creating YOUR life in three important areas.  

Ask yourself…  

1. Am I self aware?

What is my current thought? {Right now… as I read this.}

How do I feel about that thought?

Do I like that thought?

What if I thought a different thought?   

Do my thoughts contribute to my wellness?  Why or why not?

2. How do I want to show up with my family and friends?

How am I doing?

What thoughts do I tend to think about my loved ones?

Are my thoughts correct, and strengthening my relationships?

Can I think different thoughts?

3. Am I doing work I love?

How do I define a successful life?

Do I like my definition?  

Why do I even want to be that version of success?

You get the idea… what questions would you ask yourself if you were curious?  Can you imagine a better life if you asked more questions?  Do you believe you have the power to change your life by changing your thoughts, creating feelings that serve you and taking action from the place of pure curiosity? Your best life could be just around the corner. 😉

Curious, do you need help?  

Don’t let yourself off the hook.  This is YOUR life… you deserve to create it.  Do you need to enlist help from someone who will objectively listen to your line of thinking?  

I’d love to offer my services to you.  Are you curious how I can help YOU solve the issues in your life?  A coaching session will help you explore your thoughts with curiosity.  There is a system to unlocking the results you want in your life.   The first session is FREE!  

Do you believe it’s possible to create the life of your dreams?  

Here’s to a cultivating curiosity!

~Tiffany

And the birds fluttered around her writing YES in the sky!