We Are Fancy! Mister Rogers Said So!

Yep, we are fancy!  Mister Rogers said so. Must be true! 

Let me tell you my FANCY story. 

Once upon a time, my real estate career came to a premature end.  In 2008 the real estate market tanked, along with all my hopes and dreams at the time. 

Not long after I quit, my colleague Wes invited me to apply for an inside sales job at a local manufacturing company.  I had reservations.  I am not corporate or like following rigid rules.  Could I sit at a desk all day???  I decided to apply and successfully made it through an interview.  I knew I’d get it!  Wes knew I was a hard worker and good enough at sales. 

Can you imagine my shock when he called to request a second interview?  I remember telling Wes, “What the heck?  You know me.  What on earth could they need to ask me?”  Wes assured me it was just the policy of the HR department.   UUGH – stupid rules.  As I walked out my front door the morning of the second interview, I turned to asked Jeff, “I have no idea what this could be about, do you have any advice for me?”  His reply was classic Jeff, “I can’t think of anything but, {insert a long pause} this is your one chance Fancy, don’t let me down.” 

I got the job.  It lasted six months.  Turns out I can’t sit at a desk.  I saved all the money from that job for an epic trip to Italy with Jeff.  So, I technically did not let him down.   

Jeff called me Fancy, it must be true.  LOL!  Friends have nicknamed me Fancy ever since then.  I own it!

Are you FANCY?

 If fancy isn’t your thing, what do you want to be known for?  

  • A career can not determine your identity.  
  • Opinions of others can not determine your identity.  
  • ANY outside influence can not determine your identity.  

The truth is YOU determine your identity.  You tell the story of YOUR future by choosing the words you want to identify YOU.  What words would you choose? Use a Thesaurus!  Try on words as if you would try on clothes in a dressing room.  

  • Why did you choose certain words to describe yourself?
  • Do you like your reasons?

Hey seasoned woman… this is YOUR season. Be zesty! Let the words of Mary Oliver inspire you.

Hire Life Coach, Tiffany Eckhardt to help you work through who you want to be.

Steps to become who you want to BE

1. The first step is to identify what you would like to accomplish.

Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life? Mary Oliver

Allow yourself to dream big about YOUR wild and precious life.  If you could do ANYTHING this year, what would that be?  Get creative! What do you want your commemorative stone to read?

Don’t prejudge wether you think it is possible right now.  Really, the more impossible the goal the better!  Then write it down!  

2 ask yourself, “who will I need become to accomplish your impossible goal?”

Success leaves clues.  Do you know of anyone who has done what you hope to accomplish?  Make a list of attributes that person has.  

You are worth becoming the person of your dreams!   Make a list of 25 ways YOU are Fancy, fabulous, zesty, improbable, beautiful, etc!

What do you want to believe about yourself? 

3. Finally, make a list of obstacles that would prevent you from becoming the person of your dreams. 

Remember:

  • Thoughts cause feelings 
  • Feelings cause actions (behavior) 
  • Actions create results.  

It is important to understand the 60,000 daily thoughts that are rogue in your subconscious.  There is a story line in your mind that limits who you can become or achieve.  Take control of the story!  

You know yourself.  Think about the ways you will most likely let yourself down and sabotage your story? 

Make a list of 25 obstacle thoughts.  You can compare the Fancy list to the obstacle list.  

Out smart your brain by identifying the negative thoughts ahead of time.  Your brain will subconsciously use those thoughts against you. 

Now build a plan to address road blocks from a place of authority. Decide ahead of time how YOU will respond to obstacle thoughts with planned responses.  

You are FANCY!

I hope you take the time to create this one wild and precious life!  You are FANCY (if you want to be).  

You can accomplish ANY worthwhile goal if you are willing to become the person who makes that goal a reality.  Take control of your thoughts, feelings, actions and results.  

I have had the honor to work with several people in the last couple months.  It is rewarding to help people question their thoughts and develop thoughts that serve the life they want to create. 

Every brain needs a coach.  I’ve experienced a powerful transformation with coaching and self-coaching.  I’d love the honor of working with you!  Learn More: Three Reasons To Hire A Life Coach

I’m rooting for you!  Happy Holidays!!!!  

~Tiffany

And the birds fluttered around her writing “YES” in the sky!

What do curios people know?

What do curious people know?

What if curious people hold the secret to a successful life?  

Just curious, do you believe it’s possible to create the life of your dreams?  Could curiosity be the secret?

Travel has taught me to be curious. I love to wander the streets of cities we visit. I always wonder what is around the corner. Could there be something amazing to discover the next street over? Jeff and I have been lost more than once. Curiosity led Michele, Jeff and I to Paolo Sandulli’s art castle in Praiano, Italy. I’d say that was a successful day!

Martha Stewart contributes her success to an avid curiosity.  

Jeff Bezos’ childhood was marked by curious chaos.  Bezos’ mother believed it was her responsibility to allow deep dives into what he enjoyed.  She may have not always liked his questions, but gave him space to explore with curiosity.   

“We keep moving forward, opening new doors, and doing new things, because we’re curious and curiosity keeps leading us down new paths.”  Walt Disney

Curious people are known to think outside the box, not afraid to fail, explore new ideas, and have an unquenchable willingness to grow.  

See why I am drawn to curious friends?  They are kindred spirits who create their lives.  

Questions are the answers

What if curious folks just learned to ask good questions?  What if questions are the answers? 

“Getting the right question is the key to getting the right answer,”  Jeff Bezos.

Curious people tend to be innovative, not content with the status quo.  They are willing to question how they show up in their valued relationships, how their thought life effects their emotional balance and how to contribute with influence and purpose.  

What if a zesty life is an endless journey of discovery?  

How curious are you about YOUR life?  

I’ve seen firsthand the benefits of questioning my thoughts.  The right questions exposed strategic and obstructive thoughts.  Every thought creates a feeling.  Feelings influence our behavior, which gives us our results.  

Questions led to discovering what I really want in every area of my life.  

Let’s get curious about the thoughts that are creating YOUR life in three important areas.  

Ask yourself…  

1. Am I self aware?

What is my current thought? {Right now… as I read this.}

How do I feel about that thought?

Do I like that thought?

What if I thought a different thought?   

Do my thoughts contribute to my wellness?  Why or why not?

2. How do I want to show up with my family and friends?

How am I doing?

What thoughts do I tend to think about my loved ones?

Are my thoughts correct, and strengthening my relationships?

Can I think different thoughts?

3. Am I doing work I love?

How do I define a successful life?

Do I like my definition?  

Why do I even want to be that version of success?

You get the idea… what questions would you ask yourself if you were curious?  Can you imagine a better life if you asked more questions?  Do you believe you have the power to change your life by changing your thoughts, creating feelings that serve you and taking action from the place of pure curiosity? Your best life could be just around the corner. 😉

Curious, do you need help?  

Don’t let yourself off the hook.  This is YOUR life… you deserve to create it.  Do you need to enlist help from someone who will objectively listen to your line of thinking?  

I’d love to offer my services to you.  Are you curious how I can help YOU solve the issues in your life?  A coaching session will help you explore your thoughts with curiosity.  There is a system to unlocking the results you want in your life.   The first session is FREE!  

Do you believe it’s possible to create the life of your dreams?  

Here’s to a cultivating curiosity!

~Tiffany

And the birds fluttered around her writing YES in the sky!  

Got GRIT? Three Steps To Build GRIT

 

Got Grit? Tiffany Eckhardt shares the importance of choosing your feelings

Got Grit?  Yes, of course I Got Grit!

I like to think I possess a “never give up” attitude.  Yet, there are times when I bailed on my dream, have not persevered or had the passion to see a project through to the end.  I believe that I have the power to choose grit and can cultivate it.  In fact, I have the power to get back up from a failure and reinvent myself.  I have a lifetime of proof.

Let me share with you how to build GRIT!

Did you know you can choose your feelings?  

Let me share a concept that I’ve recently learned.

The human experience is a balance of the positive and the negative.   Accepting this fact allows for the negative without adding to it.  Time spent avoiding negative emotions and experiences, limits access to the power some negative emotions carry.  

For example, courage is an honorable trait that propels us to do hard things, but is an uncomfortable emotion.  The definition of Courage is – mental or moral strength to venture, persevere, and withstand danger, fear, or difficulty.  Wouldn’t it be great to be courageous in the face of obstacles without enduring fear or perseverance?  

Grit is failing forward

I have been talking about failing forward the past few weeks in an attempt to make failure more acceptable.  Failure is the uncomfortable balance to success and a necessary step in growth.  No one wants to choose failure.  Accepting it as a part of the success experience prevents adding shame, embarrassment, inadequacy, etc. to the experience.  

Once this concept is understood,  the choice is yours.  Will you intentionally think thoughts that produce the feelings required to succeed in life?  It’s worth noting that some emotions are simply negative indulgent emotions that keep us from success.  Choosing confusion, doubt or worry never moves the needle.  Choosing to walk through fear toward success is productive.  Choosing overwhelm in the face of fear keeps you stuck.  Do you see the difference?

I choose GRIT…

I have decided to become the person of my dreams.  Oh my!  2020 is going to be EPIC!  First of all, I turn 50 in March.  I don’t hate turning 50 years young.  It’s time to buckle down and do the things I’ve always dreamed of doing and being.

I made a list of emotions that I want to cultivate.  I want to be tenacious, capable, genuine, authentic, connected and creative.  

When I made the list of traits I think are important for my success, I realized that most of them have a negative connotation to them.  I want to be tenacious.  Well, that requires me to do something bold.  I want to feel capable.  Can’t feel capable sitting on the couch.  I want to be genuine and authentic, but desperately want to fit in.  I want to feel connected, but often find myself not inviting someone to coffee.  Being creative, a truly positive emotion, is my happy place.  

Recently I added gritty to my list of traits I want to be.  In fact, I am starting to see that GRIT needs to be my word for 2020.  I believe grit allows me to stay committed to the uncomfortable feelings necessary for success.  Being gritty means that I will have both passion and perseverance.

What is grit?

Grit as defined by Angela Duckworth is the power of passion and perseverance. 

“Our potential is one thing, what we do with it is another.” ~Angela Duckworth

Angela has spent her life studying grit.  You can read more about her journey in her book GRIT The Power of Passion and Perseverance or find her TedTalk on YouTube.  In her Preface she writes, “I won’t just have a job; I’ll have a calling.  I’ll challenge myself every day.  When I get knocked down, I’ll get back up.  I may not be the smartest person in the room, but I’ll strive to be the grittiest.”   

Wow!  Angela personifies grit!  The willingness to get back up from a blow, to work harder, to face fear, to embrace a calling… you get the idea.  Fail forward.  

Will Smith explains grit this way,

“The only thing that I see is distinctly different about me is: I’m not afraid to die on the treadmill.   I will not be outworked, period.  You might have more talent than me, you might be smarter than me, you might be sexier than me.  You might be all those things.  You got it on me in nine categories.  But if we get on the treadmill together, there’s two things:  You’re getting off first, or I’m going to die.  It’s really that simple.”

Angela breaks grit down two factors, passion and perseverance.  “Grit is about working on something you care about so much you’re willing to stay loyal to it.”  There are no shortcuts.  It’s about falling in love with what you do and staying in love with it.  

Train your mind for grit

Three steps to build GRIT… choose your feelings

Can you see yourself choosing grit?  It is very similar to choosing to fail forward.    

I’m not suggesting that everyone should choose grit.

I am suggesting that being intentional about how you want to show up in life is crucial to your results.  I am offering that you have the power to choose.  

Start by deciding the feelings you want to foster and becoming self aware.

1.Choose the positive feelings and the negative feelings necessary to succeed in what ever you set your heart.  

2. Keep a log of the thoughts that generate those feelings.  There is always a thought that produces the feeling.  It is also beneficial to document the thoughts that keep you in a negative indulgent emotion like confusion, worry, or anxiety.  

Here is an example of mine:

Positive Feelings

  • Abundant
  • Connected
  • Loved
  • Focused
  • Determined

Negative Feelings

  • Courageous
  • Tenacious
  • Bold
  • Fear
  • Grit

3. Journal your thoughts and feelings on a daily basis.  Are the feelings wanted, necessary or unwanted?  What thoughts produce those feelings?  Are there areas in your life that you can choose to think differently about?  Try on new thoughts.  How does the new thoughts make you feel?  This simple activity will open up so much insight!

What do you choose?

Let me encourage you to become the person of your dreams.  You may not choose grit, but you have the power to be gritty in choosing the feelings that will produce the life you always wanted!  

I am excited to bring you along on my journey!  Becoming a certified life coach is the most rewarding work I’ve done!  I’d love to help you take hold of the thoughts, to help you decide what is servicing you.  Schedule a FREE consultation to see if I’m a right fit for your journey!  It really does help to talk through the thoughts that produce the feelings, that cause action and give results in your life!  

~Tiffany

And the birds fluttered around her writing “YES” in the sky!